2018.03.18 Auf Wiedersehen Mein Schleppenwagen

Last week the company lease Mercedes Metris was returned. It was a good van.

My history with vans is not very positive. OK, technically, I have no particular history with vans at all, other than a general unjustified disdain due to the majority of my driving career being primarily interested in just having myself hurtling along as rapidly as possible. Vans are not very good for that. But it turns out that there are other purposes for vehicles than just trying to cackle uproariously at attempted bendings of the laws of physics. And, as one matures, these non-juvenile needs tend to arise somewhat more often.

For a long time, I accomplished these non-hooning tasks reluctantly and with a surly insistence that they were secondary affairs. This was possible, reasonable even, while I had some truly lofty driving hardware to play with. However, the last few years being sports-car-less has meant that I was no longer inoculated against the annoyance of having to do <waves arms> stuff.

And do you know what's better than being annoyed about having to do stuff? Being able to do all sorts of stuff without any annoyance at all. And that is the central brilliance of the Schleppenwagen.

Sure, it doesn't drive fantastically. But, to be clear, neither do any of the other cars at my current disposal. As I've griped earlier, the technically faster ones I've leased are actually less pleasing to drive because of how non-empathic the connection. The lumbering Metris did just fine, overall. And could effortlessly haul everything and everyone I happened to want to transport. 8 adults for lunch? Done. My and my friend's muddy mountain bikes? Fine. Heck - it even provided a handy place to change out of the rain after a ride.

Overall, I count the Metris as my second-favourite Mercedes I've leased - after the B-class electric drive.