2012.01.28 2012 Portland International Auto Show
While it's still true that the PIAS is really just a nice car dealer event, I have to admit that I still love seeing the direct comparisons. It's also pretty fun indulging in my varied car addictions with similarly-afflicted comrades. Although, being with a pack means some of the shots were hurried and I ended up with some blurry shots - apologies.
So, here's the event, in approximately-chronological order.
Fisker Karma
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The story goes that Fisker was contracted to help Tesla develop their Model S, but then turned around and used the technology to develop their own car. Although, arguably, the Karma is a considerably different niche than the Model S - exotic luxury performance electric with a range-extender versus merely luxury performance pure electric. Nevertheless, cutting-edge electric drive technology is probably a difficult thing to acquire, and I suspect that Fisker is indeed enslimed to some degree.
But that doesn't stop me from coveting the Fisker Karma. It was probably the car I'd be most interested in taking home with me at the whole show.
Audi R8 Spyder
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This car is proof that I'm getting old. Chopping the top off of the R8 just seems idiotic to me, even though I know that it's probably a sensational thrill to drive in a way that the coupé can never be. But I've had my share of convertibles, and while I loved the experience for what it was, I recognize that having a simple fixed roof is just better. Better engineering-wise, better performance-wise, and yes better aesthetically.
Also, I'm bald, and my head gets cold now. And burned.
Mercedes SLK
Stepping back from my rabid pro-coupé, this is a car that was never meant to be a pure performer. It was meant to be configured as it is.
What I don't like about it instead is that it's ugly. That's right - it's ugly. The first-gen SLK was moderately handsome, even though it was utterly a chick car. The second-gen was actually pretty damn good-looking. It was itself. This generation is malformed angularity. Yes - I can see what the stylists were trying to do: evoke aspects of the vaunted SLS. Give that little elbow nudge to the ribs saying, "Yeah, this is the supercar's littler sibling." Except that the SLS itself is trying to hard to look like the original Mercedes gullwings of yore, which it only just barely pulls off. Attempting to mimic that muscle-stretch posing with less muscle and more posing is just... wel, not good-looking.
BMW M3
Clayton like. If this generation of M3 had come out a year earlier, it might have been hard to resist getting instead of Richthofen. And that's saying something.
BMW Z4
I really like the looks of these cars. I really like the performance of these cars. I just don't think they're quite worth to me what they cost, and I can't get past the terrible forward visibility. When I'm driving, I like to see where I'm going in a manner that can be described as more than "adequate". But, yeah: pretty.
BMW 135
Yes, I like these too. But if this were actually a 1-Series M, I'd more than just "like" it. And, if I were stupid-rich, I'd buy a small fleet of 1-Series M's so that me and my friends could have our own stupid-smile racing series in them.
Ferrari California
Gah! So pretty! So wrong! I'd never turn down one of these, but I'd also never pay for one. Gimme a mid-engine coupé berlinetta of virtually any era instead.
[Update: Had a nagging sense after I wrote this. Turns out it's almost verbatim of what I said last year. Welcome to my rut.]
Maserati Grancabrio
"Oh, look at meeeeee! I'm almost a Ferrari!" For people who wish they were enough of a cock to drive a Ferrari, but are all verklempt about it.
But, yeah: pretty.
Lotus Evora
Oooh! Oooh! Nice. I really like the minimalist aesthetic of these beauties.
Ford Raptor
"Where does the beer go?" (Actual quote from the Pack as we surveyed the interior.)
Stowed behind the awesome, I suppose. This truck would be a lot of fun, assuming you could afford the gas.
Volkswagen Golf
Why is this in the crowd? I don't really know. It's not my style. But, for some reason, I just like GTI's. They're cool.
Volkswagen Beetle
Well, I like this better than the previous generation. It seems like more of a real car, and less of wad of cutesy nostalgia.
If I buy one, though, you'll know I've suffered some kind of horrible head trauma. Or, you know, it's 15 years in the future and I'm getting it for my (theoretical) daughter.
Acura RDX
[SPIT]
This vehicle is the embodiment of my current hatred of Acura. And it's the kind of hatred that can only be born from betrayed affection. See, I used to love Acura. The NSX (hallowed be thy name), the Integra, the RSX - all awesome. But now? All fucked up ugly shit with performance ranked as an afterthought. I like to think that even if I was capable of being objective about it, I'd still viscerally hate the stupid shiny beak grill they affect now. Screw objectivity: I really fucking hate the stupid shiny beak grill they mash on the front of all their cars now. The fact that the stame gawky gaudy styling-miscarriage is going to be shoved in the front of the new NSX is going to test my gag reflex.
But this particular vehicle, the most useless configuration of vehicle imaginable, is particularly loathsome. If you're going to be boring, at least be functional. If you're going to be ugly, at least be functional. If you're going to be boring AND ugly AND useless, at least be cheap. All-axis fail, this one.
Fiat 500 (and Abarth)
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For what they are, I really like these cars. Mind you, what these cars are - as far as I'm concerned - is an excuse for really hot models to be in commercials.
Cadillac CTS-V
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If I were old, and xenophobic, I'd probably get one of these.
Chevrolet Corvette ZR-1
If I were moderately rich and xenophobic, I'd probably get one of these.
Subaru BRZ
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If I were single, and moderately poor, I'd definitely get one of these. Thumbs-up, Subaru and Toyota. I look forward to test-driving one of these some time soon.
Scion IQ
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Actually, these struck me as being a cool alternative to Smart cars. There was a test-drive lot that I failed to have time to try out, but I probably would have liked it. Make it electric with useful range, and I'd be a fan.
Jaguar XKR
Jaaaaag! This picture is enhanced by having the Pack posing around it appreciatively.
BMW E30 M3
Yes please.
BMW 2002
Put an engine and an interior in this, and it would be lovely.
Jeep Demonstration Ride
Somehow Jeep had permission to run engines indoors, and had built an impressive obstacle course to show off the clearance, articulation, and traction capabilities of their products. It was a fun ride.
The DTNA Exhaust Pack Being Awesome
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They were seriously discussing technical aspects of the exhaust packaging and methodologies on relevant diesel vehicles. More than a few people looked at them quizzically, and when worried-looking sales staff looked at me beseechingly I gave the "It's OK - we're engineers" nod.