2005.03.28 The Significance of Connections

Everybody is more than just the maelstrom that is behind their eyes.

It might seem like everybody is an animal or an island, a selfish entity merely driving their body around to accomplish their own internal desires. In fact, it's also possible to reduce and explain virtually everything to conform with this hypothesis. The old clichés about it being a "dog eat dog world", and "life isn't fair", and "look out for number one" are all examples of this pervasive and widely-held perspective.

But it's not really true. That's just how most people act most of the time. It might even be how most people think most of the time, but that's only because most people are foolish most of the time.

The truth is that all of us are also somewhat made up of our connections to others. Even the most withdrawn loner is in many ways partially a creation of interactions with other people, though they're barely remembered or just imaginary. Even the most antisocial psychopath is a creature described largely by how well they play with others. Just ask yourself, what made you be who and what you are. It will invariably involve other people, either by their participation in your experiences or just by their mere presence.

Perhaps it's just an evolved trait relating social survival characteristics and dopamine. That doesn't diminish the very poignant kinds of fundamental effect we all feel due to our connections. It can be very much like there are little pieces of your heart, distributed over a varied population for them to safeguard. Such that when someone with one of those pieces that you haven't heard from in a while contacts you, it is as if your heart feels healed from a pain you might not have even remembered that you suffered from.

Thanks for the message, Melanie.