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	Welcome to my most half-assed review of Portland's Automobile Dealer Extravaganza to date!		Welcome to my most half-assed review of Portland's Automobile Dealer Extravaganza to date!

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RooK: Protected "2011.02.01 2011 Portland International Auto Show" [edit=sysop:move=sysop]

2011-02-07T03:02:54Z

Protected "2011.02.01 2011 Portland International Auto Show" [edit=sysop:move=sysop]

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[[category:2011 Rant]]

Welcome to my most half-assed review of Portland's Automobile Dealer Extravaganza to date!

Why so half-assed? I blame acclimation.

Back in the Great White North, affordable rust buckets were the norm. My BMW 328iS was functionally an exotic car. When I visited friends in Vancouver, I'd eagerly head down to Burrard street to look in the windows of the couple exotic car dealerships for a glimpse of a single entry-level Ferrari. Quite a contrast to the PIAS where not only is there an actual selection of exotica to peruse up close, you could be allowed to sit in the German cars that would have caused packs of kids to stop and stare in my home town. After a decade of indoctrination to the increased caritude, and a handful of years of having a Porsche 911... I'm a fully-realized car snob.

So, meh. Sorry.

==Ferrari California==

[[Image:IMG 1143.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1144.JPG|200 px]]

Yeah, it's pretty. Yeah, I wouldn't turn one down. But, no, I wouldn't pay money for one. Because now that I'm old and boring, a convertible looks mostly like compromise to me. And, frankly, if I'm paying Ferrari money, I'd rather have something mid-engine.

So, enjoy your Prancing Horse Lite, posers.

==Ferrari 599GTO==

[[Image:IMG 1145.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1146.JPG|200 px]]

Yeah, it's kind of awesome. Yeah, I wouldn't regret having one. But, again, no: I wouldn't pay money for one. Because it's not actually made for a racing series, and because apparently the main reason for its prowess is electronic wizardry, it's more of an Italian GTR than a real GTO. Also, the front-engine thing.

So, enjoy your Prancing Gimmick, douches.

==Ferrari F40==

[[Image:IMG 1147.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1148.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1149.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1154.JPG|200 px]]

Favourite. Ferrari. Ever.

Even after the splendour and technology of the Enzo and all that has come in the world of supercars, this is the original, and the purest.

Unfortunately, I probably lack the skill to drive one of these as it was meant to be. But I don't care. What a fantastic way to die.

==Ferrari 458 Italia==

[[Image:IMG 1150.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1151.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1152.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1153.JPG|200 px]]

This is probably the finest sports car in the world today - when it doesn't spontaneously catch on fire. It's so good that even fools like me could drive it really damn fast. If I had ridiculous piles of money, this is the exotic sports car I should buy.

...assuming, of course, I could get the F40 first and not die immediately.

==Lotus 2-Eleven==

[[Image:IMG 1155.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1156.JPG|200 px]]

Track toy, and couldn't resist snapping a couple pictures. Looks like fun.

==Lotus Evora==

[[Image:IMG 1157.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1158.JPG|200 px]]

I just adore the looks of this car - very pretty. And this year I managed to score a chance to sit in it, and am pleased to report that it's actually possible to get in and out of it without having to crawl (unlike the Elises I've been in). Perhaps still not really competition as a "whole car" to the Porsche Carrera, but getting there.

==Fiat 500==

[[Image:IMG 1160.JPG|200 px]]

You know, it wasn't as bad inside as I feared. And actually more utilitarian for someone my size than the Mini.

But, frankly, the best part of this exhibit was the smart hottie in the white pants suit.

==Chevy Volt==

[[Image:IMG 1161.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1162.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1164.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1165.JPG|200 px]]

Finally. Would have preferred to sit in it, obviously. But looked pretty damn good, for a small commuter-type vehicle. I might buy one.

==Cadillac CTS-V Wagon==

[[Image:IMG 1166.JPG|200 px]] [[Image:IMG 1167.JPG|200 px]]

This thing was surprisingly awesome. Pack it with a 6-speed manual, customize the exterior to delete the glitz I don't like, and this would be one seriously baddass do-everything monster.

==Everything Else==

Yeah, there were other interesting cars, but I didn't take pictures of them. Because I'm lazy.

Audi R8 convertible - heresy.

Porsches - really, who cares until the 991 comes out?

BMWs - zzzzzz... 
Well, OK, the 7-series hatchback with the poop-hole hatch was kind of funny. But otherwise, no M3 and no 1-series M means booooring.

Mercedes - puhleeeese.

Tesla - uh, actually, missing the Roadster was totally unintentional and would have definitely snapped some pictures of that. Thank goodness there wasn't a Model S - I'd have to cry.

2011.02.01 2011 Portland International Auto Show - Revision history

RooK at 03:46, 17 March 2018

RooK: 1 revision imported

RooK: Protected "2011.02.01 2011 Portland International Auto Show" [edit=sysop:move=sysop]