2:09 NSG - friendzone Part 2 - Revision history

RooK at 17:33, 11 September 2023

2023-09-11T17:33:28Z

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	So.		So.

RooK at 20:45, 25 November 2019

2019-11-25T20:45:48Z

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	Some time after that, NSG texted another message to say hello. I was delighted, and thanked her for reaching out even though I was giving her space. She wondered if I thought she had asked for "space", and I responded: no - it was a thing I was doing for myself. To be mindful of our new boundaries.		Some time after that, NSG texted another message to say hello. I was delighted, and thanked her for reaching out even though I was giving her space. She wondered if I thought she had asked for "space", and I responded: no - it was a thing I was doing for myself. To be mindful of our new boundaries.

	The contradictory nature of unspoken needs and desires when faced with the explicitly stated hopes and offers of another it not something that I can hold in a healthy way. Even though I might want to try, for someone as brilliant and lovely as NSG.		The contradictory nature of unspoken needs and desires, when faced with the explicitly stated hopes and offers of another, is not something that I can hold in a healthy way. Even though I might want to try, for someone as brilliant and lovely as NSG.
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RooK at 19:18, 10 November 2019

2019-11-10T19:18:48Z

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	It was only a handful of days before the penultimate blow. Riding along with NSG, she reiterated her view of how I had "said no" to our possibility of a relationship - even though I felt like I had never "said no", but had only agreed that I had some temporary limitations. This moved to her admitting that the trip to Montana was a test, and that I had failed. This was confusing to me, because I felt like she had been very clear that the Montana trip was meant to be free from relationship complications as much as possible. She informed me in a wistful tone that if it had mattered to me, I would have breached our clearly-negotiated boundaries.		It was only a handful of days before the penultimate blow. Riding along with NSG, she reiterated her view of how I had "said no" to our possibility of a relationship - even though I felt like I had never "said no", but had only agreed that I had some temporary limitations. This moved to her admitting that the trip to Montana was a test, and that I had failed. This was confusing to me, because I felt like she had been very clear that the Montana trip was meant to be free from relationship complications as much as possible. She informed me in a wistful tone that if it had mattered to me, I would have breached our clearly-negotiated boundaries.

	I felt a piece of my soul die. And I said that out loud, but not anything else. That was the last time I saw her.		I felt a piece of my soul die. And I said that out loud, but not anything else. The unravelling of a central knot of trust left my hopes totally adrift. If all those carefully-held conversations about how to navigate our vulnerabilities were so easily discarded - or even necessarily bypassed - what did that mean for the rest of the array of our connections? It hurt, and was terrifying. That was the last time I saw her.

	A couple mornings later, she texted me to say that to take better care of herself we needed to stop spending time together or having adventures. Which, at ~~this~~ point, was just polite confirmation. I faced my long-held fears, and spent a few days tenderly laying down my dead hopes. And cried a lot.		A couple mornings later, she texted me to say that to take better care of herself we needed to stop spending time together or having adventures. Which, at that point, was just polite confirmation. I faced my long-held fears, and spent a few days tenderly laying down my dead hopes. And cried a lot.

	When NSG wished me a happy birthday somewhat after that, I was so happy. And cried ~~a lot~~ more.		When NSG wished me a happy birthday somewhat after that, I was so happy. And cried some more.

	Some time after that, NSG texted another message to say hello. I was delighted, and thanked her for reaching out even though I was giving her space. She wondered if I thought she had asked for "space", and I responded: no - it was a thing I was doing for myself. To be mindful of our new boundaries.		Some time after that, NSG texted another message to say hello. I was delighted, and thanked her for reaching out even though I was giving her space. She wondered if I thought she had asked for "space", and I responded: no - it was a thing I was doing for myself. To be mindful of our new boundaries.

RooK at 00:32, 7 November 2019

2019-11-07T00:32:09Z

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RooK: Created page with "category:divorce "

2019-09-09T14:54:00Z

Created page with "category:divorce <font face="consolas,courier new"> </font>"

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