2:01 First there was T - Revision history

RooK at 17:31, 11 September 2023

2023-09-11T17:31:03Z

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	Dating in the modern era mostly involves filtering people through online applications. This suits me fine, as I never was - and never will be - the kind of person to intrude into stranger's personal space in public places. Starting easy, with Bumble, I created a profile and started chatting with available women.		Dating in the modern era mostly involves filtering people through online applications. This suits me fine, as I never was - and never will be - the kind of person to intrude into stranger's personal space in public places. Starting easy, with Bumble, I created a profile and started chatting with available women.

RooK at 21:07, 13 September 2019

2019-09-13T21:07:19Z

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	T: "Fuck small talk."		T: "Fuck small talk."

	At which point, I could feel my metaphorical pants fly off. My entire friendship with T after that point has needed to co-exist with the fact that I have been completely seduced by this woman by virtue of just her communication. That one interaction might not seem like a big deal, but it hit me in the bulls-eye of my intellectual connection needs. And she has done continuous versions of this the whole time I've known her. Because it's more than just saying the right thing. It's saying insightful, pointed, caring things from a place of being entirely genuine and vulnerable about her own experience and thoughts.		At which point, I could feel my metaphorical pants fly off. My entire friendship with T after that point has needed to co-exist with the fact that I have been completely seduced by this woman by virtue of just her communication. That one interaction might not seem like a big deal, but it hit me in the bulls-eye of my intellectual and emotional connection needs. And she has done continuous versions of this the whole time I've known her. Because it's more than just saying the right thing. It's saying insightful, pointed, caring things from a place of being entirely genuine and vulnerable about her own experience and thoughts.

	So, as mentioned, this progressed to actual dating in person.		So, as mentioned, this progressed to actual dating in person.

RooK at 21:06, 13 September 2019

2019-09-13T21:06:07Z

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	Sweet, supportive text buddies. All through the subsequent NSG roller-coaster.		Sweet, supportive text buddies. All through the subsequent NSG roller-coaster.



	<hr>		<hr>



	Up until the day between our birthdays, where we went out to dinner together to catch up in person. Physically proximate for the first time since the breathless parting outside a movie theater. It was very, very nice. But ended with a chaste hug that, well, I could not really parse in a chaste way at all. She is really very sexy, and I'm all flustered anew. Which is fun.		Up until the day between our birthdays, where we went out to dinner together to catch up in person. Physically proximate for the first time since the breathless parting outside a movie theater. It was very, very nice. But ended with a chaste hug that, well, I could not really parse in a chaste way at all. She is really very sexy, and I'm all flustered anew. Which is fun.

RooK at 21:05, 13 September 2019

2019-09-13T21:05:34Z

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 Dating in the modern era mostly involves filtering people through online applications.  This suits me fine, as I never was - and never will be - the kind of person to intrude into stranger's personal space in public places.  Starting easy, with Bumble, I created a profile and started chatting with available women.
-This was mostly positive.  People were nice, and relatively interesting.  It's also helpful that I filter aggressively - looking for profiles that suggest intelligence and physical activity.  The chatting portion is an opportunity to test my third main filter: communication skills.
+This was mostly positive.  People were nice, and relatively interesting.  It's probably helpful that I filter aggressively - looking for profiles that suggest intelligence and physical activity.  The chatting portion is an opportunity to test my third main filter: communication skills.
 T was the first person to crush all three requirements, and became my first in-person date.  But before we get there, I really need to go back over the chatting portion with more detail.  Because in the case of T, it's pretty special.
-<pre>...to be massively expanded...</pre>
+Among those below my arbitrarily-judged threshold for communication skills include people who essentially just provide text-grunts, people totally dedicated to small-talk despite deeper probes, and people who asymmetrically ask to be entertained without personally engaging.  It generally took me too long to try to coax these people into some sort of connection, and I let myself be frustrated a bit too much.  But it really is a rewarding feeling when you get past the superficial aspects and get to see how thoughts and feelings might mesh.  If there is a spectrum, with 75% below my communication requirement, T scored as a >99% right away.
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RooK at 17:51, 13 September 2019

2019-09-13T17:51:10Z

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			Dating in the modern era mostly involves filtering people through online applications. This suits me fine, as I never was - and never will be - the kind of person to intrude into stranger's personal space in public places. Starting easy, with Bumble, I created a profile and started chatting with available women.

			This was mostly positive. People were nice, and relatively interesting. It's also helpful that I filter aggressively - looking for profiles that suggest intelligence and physical activity. The chatting portion is an opportunity to test my third main filter: communication skills.

			T was the first person to crush all three requirements, and became my first in-person date. But before we get there, I really need to go back over the chatting portion with more detail. Because in the case of T, it's pretty special.

			<pre>...to be massively expanded...</pre>
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RooK: RooK moved page 2:1 First there was T to 2:01 First there was T

2019-09-09T11:50:42Z

RooK moved page 2:1 First there was T to 2:01 First there was T

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RooK at 11:39, 9 September 2019

2019-09-09T11:39:53Z

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RooK: RooK moved page 1.1 First there was T to 2:1 First there was T

2019-09-09T11:23:24Z

RooK moved page 1.1 First there was T to 2:1 First there was T

← Older revision	Revision as of 11:23, 9 September 2019
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RooK: Created page with "category:divorce"

2019-09-09T11:22:22Z

Created page with "category:divorce"

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[[category:divorce]]